A hard day (for mommy)

I am having a hard day today. I was hoping when Ryan woke up this morning he would be less shakey- no such luck. I just want my baby back! I know it has only been 48 hours since he has been off the meds and had his breathing tube out, but this is going much too slow for me! Ryan isn't talking- makes a few noises here and there. He can't roll over, stand, sit up very long, and he has a very difficult time controlling his tongue. I keep feeling like I am going to take a completely different child home. They tell me he will get better and will be back to where he was developementaly before all of this- but it is very hard to believe. I try to stay strong for Ryan- because I know he needs that. I go home everyday to take a shower, feed the cats, and check on the house. Just to get out of the hospital for awhile. Maybe once PT/OT comes I will feel better.